Life is Not Fair...I know

My Dearest Child,

As you left the house this morning, you screamed out, "Life's NOT fair!" in a final act of frustration and defiance.  Your words seem to still hang in the air.   I feel them here because they speak to my own feelings of frustration and anger at the news that yet another soldier has been killed from Iowa.  That makes three fathers, brothers, husbands and friends that have died in Afghanistan this month alone.  And, you're right.  Life is not fair.

I would love to allow you to believe that your sense of injustice is simply something of your youth.  That it is only something that happens in this home because of the weird rules and expectations of your parents.  However, you are already wise enough to realize that this is a part of life.  Your fellow students and friends have shown this to you.  Yes, kids who cheat don't always get caught.  Friends who "haven't done anything" get picked on.  Life is not fair.

I would love to tell you that it gets better.  That life makes more sense, and therefore it gets easier to make sense of injustice.  But, I don't think it does.  Good men and women die fighting for our country and yet we get no closer to ending the war.  The innocent become victims.  The guilty are set free.  On this side of Heaven, I find it hard to make any of this fit into my sense of right and wrong.  Life is not fair.

However, it is your youth and optimism that I envy.  You still crave justice and a desire to have things be fair.  You still get angry when it is not fair.  And, my child, you want to take action to make things fair.  You still have a desire to save the world.  Please don't loose that.  It is this desire that can make change...and, at least in a small corner of the world (your world) you will make a difference.  You will bring about justice for your friends by sharing truth in the face of dishonesty.  You will bring comfort to those who have loss.  You will affect your world even though life is not fair.

I love you.

Mom

Be Still and Know that I Am God

BE still and know that I am God

Simply just BE.

…BE in this moment.

…BE in this place.

It seems like this should be easy. Existence in itself is “the act of simply BE-ing.” However, I am all too often thinking of what I need to do next. Even though my body may be present, my mind has frequently left the premises to deal with my worries or the to-do-list in my head. God’s calling is simple. Just BE. Turn off the demands of tomorrow. They will take care of themselves. Stop my wishing for the next day…moment…event and start BE-ing in this moment. This could be the BEginning of finding contentment. It could be the BEginning of a grateful heart for what is now and what is here.

Be STILL and know that I am God.

I struggle with sitting still. There is always someplace to go or something to do. Just being still would let my thoughts and feelings catch up with me. Some of those feelings and thoughts aren’t comfortable to encounter. But it is in the stillness that I know I will find God. I am reminded of the story of Elijah as he sits waiting for God (1 Kings 19:1-18). God is not in the storm or the earthquake, but He comes as a whisper. There is comfort in the chaos and noise of my life because I can focus on what I choose to focus on…which often means that I miss out on that stillness and the soft whisper of God. It is the whisper of someone who knows me and loves me. It is through that stillness that I know I can heal from those feelings and thoughts that may haunt and hurt. It is through being still that I can simply BE.

Be still and KNOW that I am God.

There are very few things that I am confident that I really KNOW.  And, the older I get, the more I begin to question if I really know even those few things.  It is almost a weekly occurance where one of my children will teach me something new or remind me of the large holes in both my memory and my knowledge.  I'd like to claim that it is simply that my brain lacks good organization from which to easily retrieve facts and memories.  But, I suspect it is more accurate that there is just so much in there that the file drawers are jammed shut.  Plus, the world seems to insist on constantly changing details that I thought I knew.  Take Pluto for example.  It used to be a planet!  Now, I need to find that pnemonic about "my very good mother eating pizza" and relearn the planets.  Another thing I no longer really KNOW.
 
However, with that said, there are some things that I do know.  I know that I love my family.  I know that I am blessed beyond my needs.  And, I know that there is a God who made me.  I know that there is a God who is alive and present in my life.  And, I know that God is with me.
 
Be still and know that I am GOD
 
Okay.  I admit it.  I am not God.  I loved the movie, Bruce Almighty.  It was a wonderful and comical reminder of why any human shouldn't be god.  And, it is a further reminder of what a blessing it is to have a God who is so filled with grace and love.  However, it doesn't stop me from wanting to have the control and knowledge of God.  I understand Eve and why she was so tempted to eat the apple.  Unlimited power is so very tempting! In my selfishness, I desire to have my prayers answered in the way that I want and when I want.  I need a reminder that I am not God.  God is God.  God is in control.  He has heard my prayers and knows my heart.  God will take care of me.  And, with that knowledge, I am free. 
 
I am free...
...to simply BE in this moment and this time.  To enjoy the gift of knowing that tomorrow is in God's hands.
...to be STILL and hear God's voice in the silence.  Confident that in this stillness God's whisper will enter my heart and help to guide my feet.