and the fruit of the womb is his reward.
As arrows in
the hands of a mighty man,
So are the children of a vigorous youth.
Blessed is the man that has his quiver full
of them:
He shall never be defeated when he meets his enemies at the gate. - Psalm 127 3-5
It is my firm belief that the purpose of a man’s life can be
summed up in two words…
Husband and
Father.
Everything else is just the details. The choices you make and the path you
take are to fulfill these two roles. As men, we often get lost in our pursuit of less worthy endeavors like money, power,
career, sex, sports, and shiny objects that make us feel important. These pursuits are driven by Greed, Lust, and
Envy. The world around us provides a
constant bombardment of temptation meant to pull us further away from our true
calling.
For a long time I was jealous of other men. Men driven towards specific goals in the
arena of education and profession, while I struggled with no particular
direction in mind. I have learned, and
know, a little bit about a lot of things, but couldn’t find the one pursuit
that grabbed hold of me. While my
friends became scientists, doctors, military officers, business owner, and
teachers all I could do was watch and congratulate them.
While I found no more clarity in the previous matters, I now
knew that I must become the best husband I could be. And so it began. Nearly 16 years have past. During that time there have been multiple
career changes, military deployments, and many shiny things have come and gone
(these details are not important.) What
is important is that I did find the passion and purpose that I didn’t see
before.
She is an amazing woman.
Compassionate, kind, caring loving, intelligent, sexy, funny, giving,
and warm-hearted. If you are fortunate
enough to know her, then you know my words could never due her justice.
...And then there were five.
Five of the most wonderful children a man
could dream of. Bright, caring, funny,
loving…all these things they got from her.
She is an angelic mother and they are cherubs in her teaching.
Our journey together has brought us through troubles and joy,
trials and triumphs. The further we go,
the clearer the mission that God has given me to be better as husband and
father. God expects us as Husbands and
Fathers to be the Leaders of our family.
To create the way for our family.
To foster strength and courage in our wives and children. To protect them from the world when they are
young, and teach them to thrive in it as they grow.
I do not believe that God intervenes in my life to provide
food and shelter and money for my family.
I must go out and get these things for them. God does not remove struggle and make my path
smooth. I must overcome obstacles, or
defeat them. I must make the path for my
family. But, do not mistake my words,
these are not things I could do without God.
I can
do all things through Christ who strengthens me. - Philippians 4:13
Like Jacob, Daniel, Joshua, Sampson, Jonah, and David, God
gives me the strength necessary to lead my family in this world. To tear down obstacles, to overcome fear, to
stand against all that would come against my wife and children.
And He tests me. When
I become arrogant, He brings me to my knees.
When I am boastful, He trips me on my face. When I am prideful, He knocks me on my
ass. And in my weakness, He lifts me to
my feet and sends me on my way with the Armor of God at my disposal.
I will never pretend that I am the “father of the year” or
the winner of the “best husband” contest.
I only pray that I am using the strength He has given me, to follow the
right path.
The most important legacy of a man will be seen in the faces
of his children. Anything else he leaves
behind will wither and die. But his
children will bear fruit and feeds the world.
I cannot begin to count the blessings God has brought to
me. He has filled my life with the generosity
of his
spirit. And still sometime there
is emptiness. Some small corner of my
heart that has yet to be filled.
I think it is God's calling to open our home again and seek
the opportunity to adopt another child.
Crazy? I know to some it may
sound crazy. After all, isn’t five
enough? But somehow, there still seems
to be room at the table. There seems to
be another laugh missing. There seems to
be a vacancy in our family pictures. We
have plenty of love to share. There is
always room for one more.
Now, I must find a way to overcome the obstacles. Adoptions cost money. Attorney, agency and legal fees. Not to mention making bedroom space and
getting a vehicle that could hold another person! There is no pot of gold on my doorstep, but I
believe there is a child at the end of the rainbow. Now I have to find a way to pay the tolls for
the path that will lead us there.
I know that God has a plan….the challenge will be to
understand it.
Brian